Dear sleep deprived heroes,

According to Health and Science April 1st issue, fathers

as with mothers, can suffer from postpartum depression,

which negatively affects how they treat their infants.

7% of men have suffered from MAJOR depression since their child’s birth.

They were 4x more likely to spank, 1/2 as likely to read to them.

And while 80% of Dad attend the babies’ wellness check ups,

the Dr’s don’t put DAD on the radar for a check in.

While you know I’m not a Dr., I do support a lot of new couples

to help get their intimacy back on track once the little one

(or ones) arrive.

The main cause seems to be that men feel inadequate, in the way,

not helpful, all thumbs, if the mom is nursing, they can’t bond

with the child and feel left out, unappreciated or praised by

the mother simply because she’s scared too! She’s sleep deprived

too! She may have boobs but also feels all thumbs at how to calm

the child. And she many times is just as empty and needing of

appreciation and praise as the Dad is.

Solution?

First creating short yet regular times to connect, to touch.

A hug.

A moment of praise.

A moment of acknowledgment.

Believe it or not, giving that which we don’t have actually

results in the experience of having it.

This is especially true when the parents BOTH engage in self

care, self nourishing practices.

A simple walk around the block.

Connect with a friend.

Engage in your favorite past time for 30 minutes.

Accomplish something small and give yourself great praise for it.

Lastly, in my experience as a coach, depression is usually hiding

unexpressed anger.

In a healthy way with a therapist, coach like me, or even out in

nature (not at one another) let your anger be expressed.

It’s energy and needs somewhere to go.

Even journaling a hate letter (then burning it of course) can

do wonders for releasing stuck anger, lift the depression and give

you the boost to reconnect, focus on the good, tell your truth,

express your needs, praise one another and create a new groove

that works for you relationship as lovers and parents.

Deliciously yours, Allana