March 4, 2019 |

Loving Each Other World’s Apart

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Question: My significant other and I live in two separate states. I am about to retire and want to move closer to my family; however, he already lives within driving distance of his family. I don't want him to sacrifice being close to his family but I don't want to give up the chance to be close to mine. How do we find a middle ground that is fair for both of us.

Answer: I love this question, I briefly answered you on Instagram so that you could receive my loving insights more quickly, yet I wanted to go deeper because this is a popular question I get from many singles and people in relationship over 50.

Sometimes in life we live under the belief of black or white, either or, right or wrong. Other times in life we allow it to be greater wider deeper broader by letting ourselves have both... Nothing's right and nothing's wrong, we just choose to have it all.

To me it seems like your solution is right under your nose, at least for the short-term. You seem to have a successful relationship with your significant other living in two separate states, yes? He seems committed to being close to his family as do you, yes? Help me understand why you two can't continue to live in separate states and you can live close to your family as he does, and you can both continue to plan regular consistent intimate time together until the two of you decide to create a different solution.

Given that life isn't fair, I would let go of trying to figure out fairness or middle ground. I would simply create what works for you. What's effective overall.

Take time to get quiet and listen to your soul.

Let go of other people's opinions or society's judgments.

Really feel into what would Delight you.

What would allow your retirement to feel like a permanent vacation where you could have it all?

And remember that this initial choice is not forever. You could choose separate states for another three to five years if there are grandchildren you want to spend a lot of time with... yet soon those grandkids are going to think you're NOT cool anymore so you might as well then live in the same home as your beloved!

Go with the flow my love. Allow this to be easy. And if I can be of any assistance in creating this win-win, non-traditional, makes-everybody-happy solution with your beloved, I would be delighted. Simply register for a discounted $97 introductory coaching session with me at and we will all connect to create the highest outcome for all.

Humongous love XOX

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