Sizzle gone in your sex life? Do it in the woods…
So I have a glorious client who complained of boring sex in her marriage. Now I am going to give you some great ideas of what to do that turned us both on, in our coaching call… yet SHE had a husband to go try them out with and I am single and ready to unleash this on my next lover! Ha!
Yet the important step BEFORE this will work to truly enhance the erotic adventure in your sex life… is taking a look at what limiting beliefs are in the way of you having this great sex now. I mean you DID have great sex at one point, right? So what happened?
Notice if sex has become a duty, an obligation, a necessity to ‘put out’ out of fear you’re going to lose them if you don’t… who in the world wants to cook a meal, wash the clothes or have sex because they HAVE to? Getting the sizzle back is about remembering you GET to have pleasure with your partner. And CHOOSING to enjoy bliss.
My client and I found that she had a belief that a wife HAS to put out. Of course she was resisting! She had created a prison for herself! Additionally she had a belief if you didn’t put out, he’d cheat on you. Double whammy! And she hated being a woman because of this; hated men for this… and it became painfully obvious these beliefs had drowned her libido.
So beliefs can be created and thus they can be destroyed and replaced with something that ignites the fire of being alive, being a woman and enjoying pure ecstasy with her hubby.
She realized she was ashamed to be wild and crazy, naughty and adventurous because that’s not what wives do, that’s what lovers do. So we decided she’d only call her hubby “lover”. And she’d think of herself as a “lover” as well and not put out, instead CHOOSE to have sex because she loved pleasure, loved being fully expressed, loved that she had taken the reins back of creating bliss in her life.
She told me about a fantasy of hers to be dominated… yet she didn’t want to be hurt or degraded and felt stuck. She also told me that they were going on a hike so we created that she’d get him to (safely and with honor, yet role play to have her surrender…) tie her to a tree and take her right there in nature. We both squealed with delight! I had just gotten my son some Xmas tattoos of reindeer wrapped in Xmas lights… so she thought that would be cute to have on her cute butt! I told her about my pole dancing classes I’m taking at S Factor, and while they don’t have that in her small town, there IS a pole dancing class that she saw each day driving to work… yet needed permission and encouragement to get in there!
Lastly, she wanted her lover to run bathes for her like when they dated, yet felt bad asking, so I taught her about how to ask not like a demand, not apologetically but instead like a sacred sensual invitation to gift her with hedonistic bliss… that filled HIM with joy to see her so enraptured… that she had to physically and emotionally RECEIVE the bath and show him her pleasure… and I bet he’d do it more often.
Amazing sex has returned.
You can have this too.
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