Archive for intimacy expert – Page 2

Being a ‘challenge’ or playing ‘hard to get’

Question: Is Being a ‘challenge’ or playing ‘hard to get’ a good dating strategy?

Answer:  Honestly I cringe at the word strategy… it’s something I’ve worked hard to integrate in a healthy way. Strategy can be a cruel game or a series of choices that create a desired results. It can be motivated by fear or inspired by love.

Being easy is certainly not going to make you desirable! It’s important to honor your time, energy, body and life. You may be authentically busy with your kids or work and the only free night is next week. That’s not a game. That’s real.

You may LOVE sex yet choose to just enjoy a good night kiss for a few dates without sleeping with them. That’s not a game, that’s taking your time to see if you, your body, your heart and your priorities are all in alignment before you decided to have intercourse. That’s real.

However when you aren’t busy, but make him wait for weeks to see you… or when you only kiss to purposefully string someone along, be careful… if you are coming from fear based strategy to control another, then you aren’t being kind, honest or creating authentic connections. People are things, objects or possessions to own, manipulate or dominate. People are souls with hearts, feelings, insecurities and strengths. To me, honor begets honor. Kindness begets kindness. Intimate vulnerable open begets the same. And games beget games.

You want to have fun! You want to enjoy the chase! You want to savor the courting! Authentic coyness is great! Slowing revealing your true desires is seductive.

So embrace strategy as a love centered series of choices to create a desired result. If he calls Friday night asking what you’re doing that same night, say you’re busy (even if you’re busy watching a movie with your cat!) because I’d like a man to honor your time enough to call ahead. Asking him to step up, don’t play hard to get.

Symbolically or energetically, to score a ‘Queen’ is more challenging than to score a ‘Prostitute’, yes? And it should be because of the quality of experience a Queen will bring a man. She will awaken his masculine grandeur, ignite his legacy. Anyone can find someone to watch the ball game with.

Know your worth.

You are a Goddess.

Invite him to honor you and enjoy time with you.

When he does, shower him with your appreciation.

Be your lusciousness and radiance.

Savor being a sensual woman.

Be open to it getting better and better.

And if you ‘cave’ letting the fear of rejection or loneliness drive you to make choices you aren’t proud of, that aren’t aligned with your priorities, that make you easy, used or feel cheap, then please connect with me for a strategy session to heal this. Low self worth begets low self worth and we can often spiral downward into depression or hiding when we experience a series of unhealthy relationships.

This can turn around. You can honor your worth AND not play games AND attract someone who adores treasures and cherishes you. It would be my privilege to support you in having that… and more beyond your dreams. Contact my staff at admin@allanapratt.com or book your one-on-one private strategy session with me at www.AllanaPratt.com/strategy today.

You CAN have what you desire. Never give up on your dreams.

Great delicious love,

Allana

When does persistence become harassment or stalking?

Q: Allana, When does persistence become harassment/stalking?

A: I get juicy when man knows what he wants and it’s me. I adore a man who honors my heart, mind and body and wants to spend time with me. Texting and emails are great once a day or even every other day which gives me space to desire you. I love it when men notice the slope of my neck, or my goofy giggle, or to know they were thinking of me. Personally I have a life and don’t care for several texts throughout the day, yet sexting at night for half and hour can be hot. I have zero tolerance for harassment and stalking.

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So Dark. Can’t See the Light

Q: Allana, I am so lost right now. I feel like I am being pulled into two different directions. I started journaling to give myself perspective but that isn’t even working. I feel as if my marriage is over, I hate my job, and I have shut myself off for so long that my friends have give up on me. I am trying to stay out of the dark edges of my mind but I do myself asking what’s the point?

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Colliding Co-Workers

Q: Allana, there are two alpha females at my job that keep clashing and it is making work a little tense, to say the least. I feel like I am stuck between two raging thunderstorms that are about to collide and make a super-storm. Is there anything I can do?

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4 Year Old Driving Me Nuts!

Q: Allana, I am going to lose it with my almost 4 year old. I’m a single mom and he is pushing my boundaries to the point that they might break. Everything is a fight, everything is a debate, everything is an issue. He’s my only and this might be normal but between his attitude and my stress at work, I am…I don’t even know anymore.

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First Date Disappointment

Q: I have tried online dating and always post the best pic of myself but each time I have met the guy, he acts like he is disappointed. What’s the deal? Is it my personality? I hope it isn’t the bottom half of me that turns them off, that would be heartbreaking!

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