I remember when my husband and I separated, he went off to NYC to get laid for the weekend. Lovely. Then he married MY female financial advisor who found out a millionaire was on the loose. Ouch.
When my clients tell me war stories of him leaving her for a younger woman, her taking him to the cleaners, the betrayals, abandonment and cruelty that goes on, the first thing to help them out of stuck sorrow is to get angry.
There is a honoring time and place for authentic tears, yet so many of us stay there FAR too long and become sorry ass victims because it’s not socially acceptable to swear like a sailor, stick pins in a voodoo doll, and get friggen’ pissed!
Janet, during a strategy session, regained her power, potency, vibrancy and vitality by just letting ‘er rip! Now I don’t suggest you yell at HIM or HER… that’s abuse, yet let it out! We started hysterically laughing in the end! Standing up for yourself feels AMAZING!
Next is ravishing responsibility. Sober genuine honest truth telling transforms avoidance into clarity for making a new choice. Did you not have the courage to insist on monogamy? Did you pretend not to see the drinking problem? Did you think you could change them? Did you just not want to be alone? Own it. Sit taller. You chose that. You can choose again.
From a place of wondrous wisdom and awareness, new possibilities will unfold. The confidence to honor the real you fuels more authentic conversations upfront, inspires you to wear that sensual sweater you look great in, you’re connected to your luscious intuition sensing red flags upfront. You feel so GOOD about being alive that you savor dating as much as you do being in relationship. Now that’s seductive.