Most of my male Dad clients from around the globe are the same. They aren’t saying how unappreciated they feel. They have huge hearts, ashamed to reveal how hesitant and emasculated they feel, craving physical connection and timid to piss his wife off… again.
Why do they feel emasculated? When a woman leaves her heart from fear/anger/sadness… and goes into her strategic unconscious mind… she says things that she had no idea hurt him, or is even meant to kill his confidence on purpose.
What specifically is the wife doing/saying/not doing to cause that? “I can NEVER count on you to be there. You’re ALWAYS looking at other women. What a WASTE of life you are sitting on the coach. WHAT kind of father do you think you are?” etc.
What would a man say if he had the “guts”? When a man feels emasculated… if he speaks to his wife from this low self-esteem place, he’ll sound like he’s whining and make things worse. Or he’ll overcompensate and sound like a jerk. Men need to first heal their wounded heart, forgive themselves AND her, get clear on who he is, what he chooses to create in a marriage and family, and from that grounded, centered confident place, be a loving demand for the high quality of relationship and family he wants with his beloved.
Is this easy? Of course not, that’s why I developed my Dear Lover DVD curriculum for men, and coach global clients privately from across the world- this tender emasculated heart is fragile, yet once healed is the source of all his wisdom, power, clarity and sexy appeal! I’m humbled to say I’ve saved many a marriage.
How should a wife know a man wants the physical connection? Basically if he’s awake he wants physical attention. Ha! Which doesn’t mean copulation! A finger down his back when you walk by, a squeeze of his bicep while sitting beside him, a running of your hand through his hair, a touch to the thigh to let him know you’re listening, a high five when you’re thrilled he put the toilet seat down!