Have you ever had a more ‘shallow’ existence…like me back in high school where I had to have Vans, Esprit clothes, Benetton sweaters etc… I was into the high… the new outfit, looking ‘in’ at school… yet it would wear off within a week and I’d need the right purse to be cool, or the right boyfriend, later the right job, live in the right area… all these external circumstances that had this huge hit of pleasure, that rush of enough’ness and then I would be struck with the inevitable lows of pain, of not fitting in, of not being cool, of being a loser, not enough, a has been.
I would like to say that ended in high school but it lasted well into my late 20’s, sprinkled through out my 30’s and now in my 40’s occasionally happens when I see an email from a colleague who hits 7 figures, a best seller, a sold out class… I still notice how I compare myself to others to be enough and think that if only I accomplish ‘X’, I’ll have eternal peace, power and pleasure.
The same holds true with romance.
in the beginning our partner is often like a new purse, a new car… a possession that we’ve attained, a goal we’ve accomplished, a status we reached. If we see romance from that point of view, it’s only a matter of time until the new car smell wears off.
However, if we come from fullness first, if we come from deep intimate communion with ourselves first, if we see them NOT as our source, but as a contribution to our already kick ass life… and we a contribution to their already kick ass life… we stay in wonder, gratitude and active creation of a relationship that works…
Dr. Dain of Access taught me in our Your Delicious Body DVD to destroy and uncreate our relationship with our self and others every day, so that the normal honeymoon phase need not end… for you see your partner fresh every day… and you ask what grand glorious and delicious adventure can me and my partner have today?
To imagine waking up fresh each morning to your partner… dissolved of past judgments, free of grievances, truly in wonder of how good can it get… can you sense how spacious and yummy that would be each day to be kind, caring, grateful and erotic with your partner?
I swear listening to the clearings Dr. Dain created for our DVD healed me of divorce one and divorce two, plus a handful of short term relationships after… AND allowed me to have the most exquisite beyond words intimate relationship with myself I’ve EVER had… so much so that when we celebrated the completion of filming the DVD at dinner… I had tears of home, happiness, relief and gratitude that basically didn’t stop for about 24 hours… soooo magnificent… a gift I choose for everyone who reads this to have.
Adoration CAN grow every day of your existence. Choose it. Do your work to clear everything in the way of having that with you, with your beloved, with your life.