Archive for Parenting & Fatherhood – Page 2

Dads Have Big ‘ol Hearts, Too.

By Intimacy Expert, Allana Pratt

Can I let you in on a secret? I know we see our men as big, muscle bound, impermeable rocks in our lives… and they often are! Yet having coached hundreds of men around the world, one of the most misunderstood parts of them is their big hearts.

From “Boys don’t cry” to “Don’t let ‘em see you sweat”… men have been taught to suppress their emotions and many have wounded hearts from when we (not on purpose, but in our unconsciousness, fear or anger) cut off their heads, emasculated them and trashed them to their core. Read More →

Ending the Victim Cycle after a Custody Battle

After an acrimonious breakup like a custody battle, you’re not “done”. You generally need to co-parent with your former partner. There’s no “escape.”

Many people feel trapped in a prison, vulnerable against consistent threats and drama, unable to move forward in life or speak with respect about the other parent.

As a Relationship Coach, the first thing I guide my clients through is a healthy release of built up anger directed at a pillow, stomping around in nature, a kick boxing class, verbalizing it to a Coach (or you will fuel never ending battles with your ex & attract a new partner to fight with in subconscious hopes of processing this inner turmoil). Read More →

Vacation MUSTS for Mom and Dad!

My client this morning looked tanner, even had some great highlights in her hair… she had been to Mexico and enjoyed unplugging from work, playing with the kids, being in the sun, yet had bickered with her husband the WHOLE time. Both wanted to sleep in, both wanted much needed downtime, yet neither grandma had been able to come, so they needed a vacation from their vacation when they returned. Read More →

Interview with Eric Elkins

Twitter is so fun.

I meet great people like Eric Elkins, a social media strategist, author, professional speaker, and CEO of WideFoc.us (http://www.widefoc.us/), a social media strategies agency. While having an impressive and lengthy professional resume, we’ve connected because he blogs about being a single father at http://datingdad.com.

These are some of the questions I asked him… have a listen and check out his Dating Dad ebook!

1. Why did you start the Dating Dad blog? What were you hoping to achieve?

2. When you hear from people who read your blog, what do they say?

3. You’re pretty outspoken about fathers stepping up and being manly role models for their kids and for children who don’t have dads. What’s that about?

4. You told me that your blog is a chronicle of your journey. What’s changed most for you, personally, since your divorce?

5.  So why are you still single?

6. What happens to your blog and your @datingdad twitter handle when you’re not single anymore?

[audio:http://s3.amazonaws.com/AllanaPratt/APBrand/Blogs/Eric%20Elkins.mp3]

Any men that are ready to get her to say yes, do download my free report today. One man said it was more praise and appreciation than he’d received in 12 years of marriage. Sad, but true. www.GetHerToSayYes.com

Are Any of You New Dads?

Dear sleep deprived heroes,

 

According to Health and Science April 1st issue, fathers
as with mothers, can suffer from postpartum depression,
which negatively affects how they treat their infants.
7% of men have suffered from MAJOR depression since their child’s birth.

 

They were 4x more likely to spank, 1/2 as likely to read to them.
And while 80% of Dad attend the babies’ wellness check ups,
the Dr’s don’t put DAD on the radar for a check in.
While you know I’m not a Dr., I do support a lot of new couples
to help get their intimacy back on track once the little one
(or ones) arrive.

 

The main cause seems to be that men feel inadequate, in the way,
not helpful, all thumbs, if the mom is nursing, they can’t bond
with the child and feel left out, unappreciated or praised by
the mother simply because she’s scared too! She’s sleep deprived
too! She may have boobs but also feels all thumbs at how to calm
the child. And she many times is just as empty and needing of
appreciation and praise as the Dad is.

 

Solution?

 

First creating short yet regular times to connect, to touch.

 

A hug.

 

A moment of praise.

 

A moment of acknowledgment.

 

Believe it or not, giving that which we don’t have actually
results in the experience of having it.
This is especially true when the parents BOTH engage in self
care, self nourishing practices.
A simple walk around the block.
Connect with a friend.
Engage in your favorite past time for 30 minutes.
Accomplish something small and give yourself great praise for it.

 

Lastly, in my experience as a coach, depression is usually hiding
unexpressed anger.
In a healthy way with a therapist, coach like me, or even out in
nature (not at one another) let your anger be expressed.
It’s energy and needs somewhere to go.
Even journaling a hate letter (then burning it of course) can
do wonders for releasing stuck anger, lift the depression and give
you the boost to reconnect, focus on the good, tell your truth,
express your needs, praise one another and create a new groove
that works for you relationship as lovers and parents.

 

Deliciously yours, Allana

Feel Pleasure… What’s the Worse That Could Happen?

Photo Credit: Cuba Gallery

Pleasures are really interesting topic to talk about because there’s always don’t get too excited or don’t count your eggs before they hatch attitude. Don’t get too excited about that audition because you might not get the job. We are not allowed to feel pleasure in life and be excited.

Why not? We are adults. We can handle disappointment if it should come our way. If we don’t allow ourselves to feel pleasure until certainty is present, we miss the whole first feelings of the joy of the positive expectancy of what might happen.

Allow yourself to feel the pleasure of the moment.  Any moment.  There is always something to bring you pleasure in any moment. If someone gives you a compliment, take it in. Be pleased. Read More →